• journal,  journaling,  quotes,  writing/reading

    Vulnerable Writing

    Writing makes a person vulnerable. It opens you to public criticism, to ridicule, to rejection. But it also opens conversation and thought. It stirs minds, and touches hearts. It brings us into contact with our souls. So how can it possibly be a waste of time, an idle act, a mistake, a betrayal of truth? Who can possibly tell us not to do it?

    Joan Chittister

    I have two outlets for writing, my journal and this blog. Reflecting back, I believe journaling was a way to ask questions in hopes of understanding my confused life. I journal about my deepest fears, secrets, dreams, my spiritual journey, ask questions and use it as a way to put into words how I see and experience this beautiful world. Over time my journals have evolved into more of a letter/prayer addressed to myself, the Divine within me and my children. It has become an enjoyable daily habit.

    I also use this blog as a place of vulnerable writing. It is here I express my feelings and thoughts, use it as conversation to keep in touch with those who read my blog, and also attempt to put into words how I experience this world. I place myself in a vulnerable place when I post in both my words and images. I enjoy the risk.

    But, I also hear those voices telling me I can’t write, I have nothing important to say and only certain gifted people are writers. But, the truth is no one can tell us we are not writers. Today, I can say I’m grateful for these outlets on writing and the adventure of finding questions that lead to more questions. And so I agree with Chittister, writing makes a person vulnerable.

  • Black and White,  coffee life,  coffee shops,  quotes,  sunrises

    the true miracle…

    Morning sunshine at Mugs and a dirty lens

    “… the very fact that anything exists is supernatural—literally beyond the rules of the natural world… the true miracle is existence itself.”

    A cold Sunday morning. The numbers on my car dashboard said it was 14 degrees at about 6:47 am. I’m back home after getting my chai latte fix and my beautiful barista fix. This day is starting out good. Now to clean my lens.

    I do not consider myself a philosopher. However, I do have a tendency to lean towards asking a philosophical question once in a while. For example, there have been those moments in my life when I am overwhelmed with the of beauty and existence of the world around me, all of it, and questions arise. Why am I here? Why are we all here? How can that bird sing like that? Why can’t I see the wind and not just the effects of the wind? Why do I breathe without even knowing why or thinking about it? Maybe that philosopher within me is what enjoys finding and asking the questions but not necessarily wanting an answer. Or, maybe the deepest and more important question is to ask myself to look for all the miracles around me, notice them, stand in awe of them, find gratitude in them. They do exist! Anyway, it is a miracle that we are all here, that we exist! If you got something from my confusing ramblings, great. If not then forget what you just read and have a wonderful Sunday!

  • leaves,  lifestyles,  Plants,  quotes

    One of those moments

    “Don’t ask the world to change….you change first.”

    Anthony de Mello

    It was one of those moments. The ground around me was changing every second as leaves from the elm trees were constantly descending everywhere. I took three photos before I stopped and settled into just being the observer of the beautiful moment I was experiencing. If you look closely you will see one leaf in mid-descent just to the left of center.

    Had a wonderful lunch with my oldest daughter today. We talked about those questions we all seem to ask, “What do I want to do or be when I grow up?” She is one of many who have attained the career goals, the family, home, cars, money and more. She now asks what else is there? Seems I’ve reached a point where things do not have the value of the past. What’s important are those things I cannot grasp but only experience and live: peace, serenity, love, compassion, family, friends, journaling, photography, and… you can fill the rest of the list. Sounds like changes are about to happen in her life.

    It’s been a cold day. Finished my steps and I’m in for the evening. Will have a Zoom chat with a friend who just moved back east.

  • clouds,  landscape,  Mary Oliver,  natural areas,  Pineridge Natural Area,  poems,  poetry,  sunrises

    It’s about…

    The Journey
    One day you finally knew
    what you had to do, and began,
    though the voices around you
    kept shouting
    their bad advice –
    though the whole house
    began to tremble
    and you felt the old tug
    at your ankles.
    “Mend my life!”
    each voice cried.
    But you didn’t stop.
    You knew what you had to do,
    though the wind pried
    with its stiff fingers
    at the very foundations,
    though their melancholy
    was terrible.
    It was already late
    enough, and a wild night,
    and the road full of fallen
    branches and stones.
    But little by little,
    as you left their voices behind,
    the stars began to burn
    through the sheets of clouds,
    and there was a new voice
    which you slowly
    recognized as your own,
    that kept you company
    as you strode deeper and deeper
    into the world,
    determined to do
    the only thing you could do –
    determined to save
    the only life you could save.

    Mary Oliver, from Dream Work

    I usually read one or two of Mary Oliver’s poems when I go to bed. This poem called The Journey, kept me awake the other night so maybe I need to rethink that routine. Anyway, the poem rocked me because it’s asking questions that I’m still asking myself at 72 years of age. It’s about transformation of an inner journey. So, it is asking if I’m willing to take all the risks involved, if I dare listen to the voice within, to face a death of some kind, to let go to something I’ve outgrown and the birth of a new self. It’s about learning to trust myself, about leaving the bad advice and demands of other people behind and even the voice of my own insecure egoic self, and to follow my own instincts, my own path in life. What does it say to you?

    Today is my 72 birthday. I will most likely spend some time with my feathered friends at one of the natural areas, have a mocha or chai, get in some reading and journaling time. Basically, I’ll continue to spoil myself, even at this age.

  • clouds,  landscape,  natural areas,  Plants,  quotes,  reflections,  trees

    More questions…

    Sunset over Riverbend Ponds Natural Area

    Walt Whitman wrote over 150 years ago in his book Leaves of Grass that the United States: is not merely a nation but a teeming nation of nations. It seems like a good question to ask ourselves: How well does each of us hold to the idea we are a nation of nations? It’s also interesting that the first word in our Constitution is we. Which leads to another question: how and who defines “we”? Yes, I’m a thinkin and asking questions again this morning. Hoping you have a wonderful weekend!

  • grass,  landscape,  mountains,  natural areas,  Plants,  quotes,  Reservoir Ridge Natural Area

    Happy Earth Day

    Green blades of grass in the open meadow at Reservoir Ridge Natural Area

    “I have been and still am a seeker, but I have ceased to question stars and books; I have begun to listen to the teaching my blood whispers to me.”

    Hermann Hesse

    This low perspective shows some of the green we are seeing in the meadows. We really do need to see some moisture and that may happen this coming weekend.

  • Black and White,  John O'Donohue,  quotes

    … the lantern

    One of the most exciting and energizing forms of thought is the question. I always think that the question is like a lantern. It illuminates new landscapes and new areas as it moves. Therefore, the question always assumes that there are many different dimensions to a thought that you are either blind to or that are not available to you. One of the reasons that we wonder is because we are limited, and that limitation is one of the great gateways of wonder.

    John O’Donohue

    If asking a question does offer a new landscape, then altering how I ask that question, even slightly, offers a new landscape in thought. This is a wonderful metaphor for landscape photographers. When I move 10 feet this way, or lower my perspective, I change how the camera sees the landscape. It’s good to always be asking questions.